Just a quick note before I go to bed:
I went to depression group this evening. I wasn’t sure that I felt well enough to say anything and I was seriously considering remaining silent, the first time I’ve been anxious enough at a meeting to do that, I think. However, I did speak and it turned out to be very helpful. I spoke about my job interview and the presentation I’ve been stuck on for days now. People felt that I was interpreting the question too narrowly. My Dad and E. said the same thing. To be honest, I’m not entirely sure they are all right, as the question does seem quite precisely worded to me, but I feel there’s enough reasonable doubt for me to interpret the question in a wider way without coming across as a complete idiot (only a partial idiot). I will try to write something over the next few days and get to the interview, treat it as interview practice and try not to think of them laughing at me the minute I leave the interview room.
I also spoke about the autism screening and people were generally supportive of that too. Someone said if I feel strongly that I’m autistic after doing research, that it’s a good fit for me, that’s a sign that I am autistic. I have now asked for an appointment for an autism screening. Again, I’m somewhat apprehensive, fearing wasting their time and that I might end up with a negative or inconclusive result as in the past, but perhaps I understand myself, and autism, better than at my last assessment ten years ago and can give clearer and fuller answers.
One job I’ve just seen advertised, for an assistant librarian at a private school for girls, has “A healthy sense of humour” as a requirement for candidates. I wonder what that says about the students – and staff? – at the school. I have visions of St Trinians…