Really burnt out today. I guess leaving job + depression group + end of busy week + lots of noise this morning (see below) isn’t a good combination. I should really be doing job hunt stuff, either trying to resuscitate my lost job application or revise cataloguing to see if I can get that temporary cataloguing job at the library I’ve just left, but I don’t feel able to do anything. Before I just wanted to eat and watch TV.; now I just want to lie down and nap. I did at least clear most of a huge backlog of emails. I have no energy or motivation whatsoever and I suspect that if I did try to do something, I would quickly discover I have minimal concentration too. I did manage to go out to buy mother’s day flowers for my Mum, although I accepted a lift from my Dad; I tend to get flowers on the Friday before so she has them for Shabbat (the Sabbath), plus I’m volunteering on Sunday so will be short of time.
Depression group last night was more difficult than I made out in my last post. I was feeling very drowsy and it was hard to concentrate on what people were saying, which I felt bad about, but there wasn’t a lot I could do about it. I’m just glad I made it to the end.
My sister was here this morning. She and her husband are in the process of moving in to their new house (not fully renovated yet, but finished enough that they can move in) and she had removal men here taking a lot of her/their stuff that was still here (she had a lot of her books here, plus a lot of their wedding presents have been sitting here for over a year, waiting for them to have a home with enough space for them). I somehow slept through most of the noise, drifting in and out of sleep and having strange dreams, but I did get up in time to speak to her briefly before she went. She brought good health news about her in-laws, which was good, although it reminded me that I have friends who are struggling with a family health issue and I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing to support them. I feel that I’m not good at that sort of thing.
I suppose I should go and try to do something vaguely productive before Shabbat comes in…