It seems that I forgot to take my medication yesterday, morning and evening. While I can believe I forgot the evening dose, as I was rushing to go to depression group, I’m a bit surprised I forgot the morning dose. But it would explain why I was so anxious and despairing yesterday. I do feel a lot better today.
It’s also worth noting that my parents are really proud of how well I’ve coped with things this week, the things I’ve written about here and the things I don’t think I should share yet, if at all. They said that I’ve coped a lot better than they expected/feared.
There isn’t a lot left to say. I was feeling OK today, but suddenly my mood will drop with no obvious trigger. I feel quite sad at the moment, without really being sure why (possibly empathy for a friend whose family are going through a very tough time right now). I hope I feel well enough later to get to shul (synagogue) tonight, because that is very important to me, even though I have been struggling with it lately.
Big events are happening in the geopolitical world and part of me would like to write about how that affects me emotionally, but I haven’t really got the time or, if I’m honest, the inclination. Writing about my emotional response is likely to lead me sooner or later into writing about my political response, which I have no real wish to do. Politics in general just seems so poisonous these days, although one can probably overstate it; I’m not convinced by arguments that global politics is as broken and dangerous as it was in the 1930s.