I was exhausted again today and slept through the whole morning and struggled to get dressed when I did wake. I did eventually get going and discovered that I have a job interview next week at a Very Important Institution. I have applied for jobs there before, but never got to interview stage. Because of COVID, it will be an online interview, on Microsoft Teams, which I have never used. I need to write a presentation and think of questions to ask the interview panel after their presentation on the project/institution. So the novel and other job applications are on hold for a bit. I’m nervous. I would probably be more nervous if I thought I had a chance of getting the job, but I can’t see myself getting a job at such a prestigious institution, still less my being able to cope with it. I know, I’m being negative about myself again.

I started working on the presentation. It’s supposed to be about an information management project I’ve worked on. I could only really think of one that was suitable. It was only two years ago that I finished it, but I can’t remember much that’s useful. One trait of autism that isn’t so widely known is poor recall of one’s own personal experiences (autobiographical memory) and this is something I have experienced a lot over the years. My parents took us on some expensive holidays when I was a child, but my memory of them is patchy, a fact that I always feel guilty about, even though it’s not my fault. It is making it hard for me to remember what exactly I did in previous jobs, the processes I learnt, what I would have done differently and so on. The presentation is currently about four minutes long and I don’t know what else to say. It doesn’t really present me as a brilliant worker either, but I’m stuck.

***

It has, I guess, been a day, if not for new beginnings, then for moving things on. As well as the job interview, I received an email from an agency asking if they could submit my CV for another job, plus in the post came a thick letter from the hospital that assess autism. There was a questionnaire for Mum before her interview in a couple of weeks’ time and a HUGE form for me to fill in (incidentally, why is “filling in” a form the same thing as “filling out” a form?).

As a result of all this, I didn’t do much of what I expected to be doing. I spent an hour and a half on the presentation and thirty-five minutes on Torah study; I would have liked to have done more of both, but ran out of time and energy (and positivity, in the case of the presentation). I cooked some plain pasta for dinner too. I did a couple of small chores, but that was most of my day.

8 thoughts on “Things Happening

  1. Good luck with the online interview. Why not do the presentation on the special library you recently overhauled and catalogued? … I think the English fill in a form and the Americans fill them out!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks. I did think of that topic and rejected it because another topic seemed more similar to the job I’m applying for, but now I’m thinking of going back to it as there is more to say, particularly about things I would have liked to have done differently if I had had more time/budget. Although strictly speaking I didn’t catalogue the library, as I ran out of time, but I think I still did quite a bit.

      Like

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